Tears To Melt The Snow
by haveyouseenmyhaggis
Summary: When death is fast drawing in, only the tears of a lover are enough to melt the snow.


**Title: Tears To Melt The Snow**

**Summary: When death approaches, only the tears of a lover are hot enough to melt the snow.**

**Author's Note: This was inspired by a song called _How Far We've Come _by _Matchbox Twenty. _One of the lines in the song really touched me and if you know the song you might be able to pick it out. I hope you enjoy this piece but please be aware of the dark themes and character death. Yes, it's AU, I know.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Torchwood. _**

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If you were to walk down the street that lonesome Friday night in November you probably wouldn't suspect anything. To you, the snow would just fall around you as you walked and maybe you'd kick up some clouds of fluffy white powder but you would never think that maybe somebody was dying in it. You'd never think that someone's heart was breaking into a million tiny pieces that night. As you looked up at the swirling snowflakes in the light of the lamppost, you wouldn't even begin to think that it was the last image a man was going to see – but it was.

"But Jack, you know you can't die!" Ianto whispered quietly as he held the Captain's freezing hand tightly. Ianto was clutching him tightly to his chest and on his lap. He kept a tight arm around his shoulders, "You'll be alright." There was an urgency in the younger man's voice that didn't go unnoticed. They both knew what Jack's death would do to him.

"Yan, I'm sorry. I don't think I can come back this time," Jack said softly. Ianto could tell his words were coming with great difficulty and it was an effort for the Captain to keep his sentences joined.

"Don't say that," Ianto said stubbornly. He couldn't let himself believe that. What made this death different from any other? What made Jack so sure he wouldn't come back this time? Couldn't he at least let him believe he'd come back? Well, maybe that would be harder. He had to have a chance to say goodbye.

The snow was stained a tragic sort of red. It was on both their clothes and skin. There was crimson everywhere. For a moment it was all Ianto could see. Blood – Jack's blood; Jack's life force. They were in an empty play park and it seemed such a silly place for someone to die. Play parks should be places of happiness and games; not places where you lose the person you love most in the world. The nearby swings were blowing gently in the late night's breeze and the first flakes of that night's snow was beginning to fall. They were already surrounded by a thick covering of snow and Ianto was too upset to notice. Jack was too sleepy to care.

"Ianto, I'm sorry. That kind of poison... I've seen it before," Jack said quietly with tears in his pale eyes. There was intense pain burning there and Ianto wanted nothing more than to take all the suffering from his lover and get rid of it. He reached out and stroked the other man's cheek idly. Jack smiled at Ianto's touch and shut his eyes and just let himself feel the movement of his hand one last time.

"But you're different Jack," Ianto urged, "You'll come back!" The first of the tears started to fall then. The heat of them felt like fire against the chill of the winter.

"I'm so sorry Ianto," Jack said as his lip trembled with the effort of holding back his own tears of pain and anguish, "I'm sorry, Yan, I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault Jack," Ianto consoled, "It could never be your fault!"

"I'm sorry..." Jack repeated again. Ianto squeezed his hand tightly and watched as the Captain struggled for breath. The poison he'd drank to save Ianto from death was beginning to take effect now. Jack being shot and poisoned was one of the most painful things Ianto had ever seen and he couldn't get the image out of his head; Jack's wide, terrified eyes as the bullet slammed into him and the look of regret as he'd been injected with a poison that had killed so many before him. Ianto had been hidden behind a patch of bushes and under strict orders to stay there until told otherwise. He'd waited quietly but only because he knew it would hurt Jack more if he were caught. He couldn't do that to him.

"What for?" Ianto asked. As far as he was concerned Jack had nothing to apologise for. Right now he just needed to survive. He needed to be alright.

"For anything I... Anything I ever did to hurt you," Jack whispered sadly. There was such an intense guilt in his eyes and it tore Ianto apart to see that. He didn't want Jack to die thinking he needed to say sorry for anything.

"Jack, I love you," Ianto said in one breath, "Do you think I would be saying that if I wanted you to apologise?"

"It's not impossible to love someone who's going to hurt you," Jack said with a half laugh.

Ianto smiled weakly, "You're not bad for me in the slightest. Jack, you're the best thing thats happened in my life."

"But I could be the worst," Jack countered miserably.

"Stop arguing with me," Ianto demanded with a small smile. Jack's mouth formed a small smile and that alone seemed to make the whole situation slightly better. There was always something about Jack's smile that made Ianto feel like the sun was suddenly shining. What if he could never see that smile again?

"I remember that night you said that to me in the back of the SUV. I was trying to convince you that Owen wouldn't just walk in on us," Jack laughed, "You said we should-." Jack broke off with a wince and a cry of pain. Ianto's eyes widened in worry. Jack had tensed in pain and was clutching his stomach tightly. "God, Yan, this is it."

"No!" Ianto protested weakly.

"There's so much... I never said," Jack said. He really was struggling to find the words now. He couldn't quite form them properly in his mind and it was becoming an effort just to keep breathing, "So much... I'm just glad... Glad I've got someone to say goodbye to."

"Jack, you were here and that's all I can ask for," Ianto said gently, "And I love you."

"Can... Can we do... Can we do one more thing?" Jack asked with a ghost of a playful sparkle in his eyes. That was a shine that Ianto would remember forever. No matter how much pain he was in, Jack would always have the shadow of fun in his eyes.

"What? Anything," Ianto said looking worriedly the Captain.

"Can... Can I kiss you?" Jack asked, almost awkwardly. Ianto blushed slightly and noticed a stray tear dripping down Jack's cheek leaving a glistening trail. The young Welshman leaned forward slowly and pressed his lips to Jack's. He felt his heart racing as it always did when he touched Jack. For a moment it was like he could feel all the kisses he'd ever had with Jack in great intensity. This time though, Jack's kiss wasn't fiery or passionate as it often was; it was soft and gentle. It showed the incredible love that was shared between the two men. Ianto wanted to hold on to the moment forever but of course, fate would never allow that.

"I love you," Jack whispered tenderly before his body went limp. It was then that Ianto knew this really was the end for Jack. There would be no coming back this time no matter how much he wished for it. No matter how much pain he felt he wouldn't be able to bring back the one he loved. At least it wouldn't be long before he'd see Jack again. Maybe not in this life but soon. Jack would always be in his heart and his thoughts no matter what. There was a name for a feeling like that; a feeling so strong it consumed ever atom of your existence. The name for it is just one word; one word that has so much strength behind it. That word is love.


End file.
